a short story, written through the solar eclipse in 2018 Summer.
There is a very hungry dragon circling our planet as I am writing these sentences. He is so hungry that I can hear his stomach grumble.
My stomach is joining along, I bet yours is too. You know stomachs are connected, don’t you?
“What is it that you want, dear stomach?” I ask.
“I want to eat the sun,” she says. “Just like the dragon.”
“Oh…” I say. “That is a first. You’ve never wanted that before.”
“Now, I do. Today, I want to taste the sun.”
My stomach is like a baby, worse she is my forever baby. She gets hungry. She gets angry. She is not an organ I can ignore. She demands an intimate relationship of her own. I know what she likes, what she does not like, how she likes, how much she likes, when she likes. I know what she is disgusted of. I know when she is about to empty herself out. I know when she is closed. And I must admit I am so very used to giving my stomach her wants.
Just like the day at 6 am she said: “Wake up. I want a trout.” And I baked her a trout with my eyes half open. That was a very unusual behaviour even for her since she tends to be closed for some hours when I wake up.
Well, I maintain her highly. I indulge her plenty perhaps this is why we have ended up in this story where she wants to eat the sun. I do not know. She is a stomach. She is not spoiled. She is just an eccentric.
Am I in denial like my mother?
This time though, it is a bit more complicated. It is the Sun she wants to eat and there is a dragon involved.
“But the dragon must be very hungry,” I say. “He has been waiting for six months to eat and his cosmic-Sun-eating time has finally arrived. And you know what ancients say: the Sun is his to eat.”
My stomach gets very sad. I have no words to describe the sadness of my stomach. She does not talk. She does not want to eat. She does not want to drink. She starves herself out of the world. And I can feel her shrinking. The thousands of years old tradition of the sun being eaten by the dragon during the eclipses means nothing to her. She is a hungry stomach and her hunger can only be appeased by eating the sun.
As I can feel her shrinking into her tiniest bean self, I give up. I easily give up when it comes to her.
“Okay, let’s eat the sun.” I say.
She expands and stretches with excitement as if waking up from a long winter sleep and finding that food is all around her.
“But how are we going to snitch the Sun from the dragon?” I inquire.
“I am glad you asked,” she says. Of course, she has a plan. “Now… You are going to close your eyes. Close them, hurry up.”
I obey and drop my eyelids.
“And imagine that you are a DRAGON. A very hungry dragon!”
Okay, I can do that. I start imagining.
“Stop imagining your dragon’s color, silly.” She catches me.
“We don’t have time for this! You just imagine that you are so famished. If you don’t eat the sun, you will die. So we must fly off the Earth and reach our star before the cosmic dragon makes his move. Otherwise our hunger will continue till the next eclipse time.”
The idea of her talking about this for six months and throwing tantrums all along is unbearable. I’d better imagine.
“But how do we get to the sun?” I ask.
“You are a HUNGRY dragon and you have wings to fly with. Now, spread and beat your wings. Fly!” my stomach says out loud. Then, she starts grumbling and complaining about how she must tell me what to do all the time. I cannot think and act on my own.
Oh, my wings. I search for them whilst imagining how to be a winged being.
“If you don’t flap your wings now, we are going to be late and the sun will be eaten. AND I will be SOOOOOO cross with you” my stomach scolds me.
“Nausea and vomiting are on the table.”
She knows how I hate those. Is my stomach really blackmailing me? Unbelievable. Being a being with stomach is tough!
“Okay. Okay. Don’t vomit. I am flapping the wings that I have on each side of my body.” At least, I am imagining that I am.
“Perfect. Flap, my dear winged one.” My stomach is very into it now.
“Oh, dear.” I sigh when I see the heights we are reaching.
“Don’t look down. You make me nauseous.” she complains.
I turn my gaze toward the sky. We are flying off of our planet and that sure is a strange feeling. Are we made to be out of here really?
“We are getting out of the atmosphere. But you don’t care because you are a cosmic dragon. You don’t need air.” My stomach says confidently. I am not sure where she conjures all this confidence. It sounds like she has already figured everything out.
I don’t need air. Perfect. Bye bye, air. It has been nice breathing you. At the moment, I say bye to the air, the last bit of air reaches my brain and tickles the thought of the very hungry, very ancient dragon. Oh my, I am not the only dragon in space, am I? I should have never left the Earth.
“How about the dragon?” I ask.
“What happens when he sees us? The sun is his. We are interfering with a cosmic event that has been happening for eons.”
“I know. I know.” She dismisses me. “But maybe he is tired of being imagined as a sun-eating monster. Maybe he wants to take an eclipse off now and then.” My stomach tries to fool and comfort me at the same time. Those two like to go hand in hand.
“I really don’t want to bet on that. And you know he knows how to be a dragon better than we do. I don’t stand a chance if he does not want to take an eclipse off and decides not to eat the sun.”
Oh my goodness, we are going to be burnt one way or another with the breath of the dragon or with the sun’s rays. I am about to sob and shed the last tears I have before everything dries, burns and dies.
“The Sun is not going to burn you. You are a dragon. You are Sun’s daughter.”
Even though, she says so, for the first time I can feel my stomach being a bit worried. Not about the sun but about the dragon. She is thinking and thinking and thinking. She is digesting some ideas and digesting some more.
We are out in space now, passed the moon. Oh, aren’t you gorgeous?
“Concentrate! We have no time for the Moon. The Sun will eclipse soon.” My stomach disturbs her own silence. She knows me so well. She remembers all the moments she had to wait in hunger as I was lost in the moon.
“The Earth is getting smaller and smaller. Don’t look back. I may get upset.”
“The dragon will see us soon if he has not sensed us already. Maybe we’ll go back.” I say, still trying to abort the mission.
A light bulb gets lit inside my stomach.
“Hush. This dragon is too concerned about playing his part right. He shall sense us not. But… he might see us, you may be right. We do not know where he comes from. That means we cannot hide. But I know what we are going to do. Invisibility will save us.”
What now? I was imagining a dragon and now I must imagine an invisible dragon. Do I still have imagination power left within me?
“Of course, you do! Imagination is endless. You can never spend it all. The more you imagine, the more imagination you have.”
How do one become invisible? How can I become something that cannot be seen? One can be ignored but this leads me nowhere in here.
“Keep flapping. We stopped moving.” I was floating in space and in my invisibility thoughts briefly. She has noticed, of course.
“Okay, okay, I am.”
Just like I am flying in space, I can disappear in space. I can imagine myself not reflecting the light, not being seen. My skin starts to tickle with the possibility of disappearing. It is still there but not there at the same time.
“I did it. The invisibility is happening.” I cheer.
“Is it? I feel nothing. Should I feel something though?” My stomach sounds as confused as I am.
“Nope, false alarm. I can still see my whiskers in the corner of my eye.” I say.
As I am hissing, dragging the sound of the –s from whiskers because I am so very annoyed, we suddenly hear the dragon and the fear officially kicks in. He must be close. My heart joins in now, racing.
“I wanted to leave you, two alone.” Heart says. “But I should have known, you would not be able to complete this mission without my courage and wisdom.” Heart resents us both for discarding her and makes sure that we know it.
“Now, unlike some others who are incapable of not being needy, some of us possess the knowledge of being here and not here at once.”
It feels like the rest of my body agrees. They can feel my fear and it is affecting them too.
“We’ve decided to help.” my heart says. “We will grant you the invisibility you want. The dragon is blinded by the Sun. He does not expect you. It will be easy to be invisible to his eyes but we ask something in return. We want you to care for us as much as you care for her.” Heart speaks of the stomach.
I stop and float in space for a second or two or three. Me and my organs all float in space for a very deserved apology.
“I am so sorry,” I say, “that you have felt not cared as much as I care for my stomach. This was not my intention.”
My heart cuts me and adds my brain into my cared organs list.
“You are very fond of your brain, too. As much as the spoiled hallow bean, even more if dare say so. The brain is your favourite. We all know that. Is she not?” My heart mumbles. I feel she is fishing for a no and for some love.
I laugh.
“Oh dear heart, how madly I love you and I know you feel my love too. Your beats make me dance in this lifetime.”
My heart is dancing with her self right now. She feels perfectly flattered.
“Very well then! You have made some points in space today. Things shall change from this day on. I promise you that.” I say.
We agree. With a little help from the rest of my body and my fear, we become invisible.
“Well, this is brilliant…Thank you.” I say in awe.
They giggle a you-are-welcome. They feel happy to be involved. But there is a “but” bubbling inside of us.
“But… when we eat the sun, the dragon will notice.”
“We will only eat a tiny bit of the sun. I don’t need the whole sun, I just want a tiny bit to taste the fire inside of me. The dragon will never notice it.” My stomach explains.
“Once we eat our piece, we must hurry and get back to the Earth. I do not want the dragon noticing us, with a piece of sun inside that he was meant to eat up all at once.” I say.
Also, I don’t think I can make the sun invisible. I don’t believe the sun will ever agree to become invisible. It is all about the light and visibility. My stomach nods. We agree. She knows that once we eat the sun we will shine. And burn. I am officially freaking out. Fear is not letting go of me. Not yet.
“Don’t you ever forget, you are a dragon. You are the fire personified. Fire can never burn you. It can only make you more powerful, more fire-full. Only if you forget that, we will burn.” My stomach cautions me.
I am a dragon. I am a dragon. I am a dragon.
We are flying fast, as if there was a push from the space and a pull from the sun. We pass Venus, almost bump into Mercury. That one is so fast and the sun is so very blinding. But we are on a mission. We are drooling as the sun is shining right in front of us with all its glory.
I am a dragon. I am a dragon. I am a dragon.
But still I am burning a bit, sweating plenty and not liking to be this close to the sun. Not very dragonly of me, I know. But if it was me choosing, I would be an ice dragon. What can I say?
I am a dragon. I am a dragon. I am a dragon.
Time has come. It is now or never. I open my mouth and bite a small fireball, big enough to fill my stomach and small enough not to be noticed. There it goes. There is a piece of hot plasma inside my mouth. It is a curious feeling. Do I chew it? No, that does not feel right.
It is happening. I am swallowing the sun. Here we go. I hope you are ready, dear Stomach.
“We ate the sun.” I say in tones of simultaneous belief and disbelief once my mouth becomes empty.
Well done me but there is a hole I have created. My dragon tries to fix the sun with her claws, just like when I was a kid stealing something from my mom’s perfectly set table. I try to sculpt the sun back to its fullness. It’s hard. Damn claws. At least they don’t get burned. Okay. It seems slightly better. The dragon might notice it if he looks closely but I doubt that he will.
“Oh my, the sun has arrived” my stomach adds with great foodgasm. “Now, let’s go back. Thieves don’t linger.”
With the sun shining inside us, we are lighting space as we fly. I flap my wings as if I will never ever use them again and this is their last flight before they die. It feels like a rapid aging for my dragon body, I am almost racing with the light and shedding my imagination behind. Before I enter back into the earth my dragon body melts into space and I transform into a light touching the skin of the earth.
“Thank you, Dragon.” I whisper. “You have been a great companion.”
As my stomach and I land on a beautiful hill overseeing the sea, back into our human form with a bit of the sun still inside us, it starts to get dark little by little. The dragon is eating the sun. If the ancients were around, they would be banging on their drums and on their pots to frighten away the dragon and make him leave their sun alone. But they are not around. And the eclipse is happening without noise.
I know I can stay like this and journey with the sun within me until my time comes to an end but I also know my human body does not have the eternity and she cannot keep the sun to herself all the time.
“Well, you got what you wanted, you made me swallow the sun. Hope you are filled with joy and satisfaction?” I say looking down at my belly.
“I am very pleased. How about you?” My stomach replies.
“I feel a bit tired and heavy. Do you mind starting to digest?”
“As a matter of stomach-fact, I do mind. I don’t feel like digesting now.”
I knew it. You, little spoiled one. “Ohhh-kay. What now, then?”
“Now, I will sunbath a bit.” Stomach says.
The sky may be getting dark but my stomach has a sun of her own, so she gets to sunbath.
“How about me?” I ask. “Does anyone care about me? I did everything you asked for. And I am left with a heavy belly and sunbathing stomach all alone.”
My stomach shrugs.
“With a piece of the sun inside you… perhaps you do what you are meant to do…” What am I meant to do according to my stomach other than eating I wonder.
“You write your stories.” My stomach says with the delight, she is getting from her sunbathing. I freeze. Even the sun I swallowed must be frozen. What?!?!
My heart skips a beat and uses that beat to whisper: “I believe I am owned my own story as well.” Then the rest of the gang join along. Every organ wants a story of their own.
Wanting a story must be the new wanting to eat the sun.
Even my raptured appendix that is not there anymore haunting me as a ghost with her demand of a story. She believes she would have the coolest story, since she literally exploded inside me. My ex-appendix may have a point. But this is getting out of control. I try to turn this around.
“I am not a writer.” I tell them.
I look down at my belly and see the sun still shining, warming my insides, and unfreezing me, which is quite uncomfortable. I look around, it is all dark. I am the only shining light around during daytime. This is a strange feeling.
“The dragon ate the sun.” I say pointing my finger to the sky where the sun was meant to be.
“And you ate the sun as well. Now, when are you going to start writing your books?” my stomach demands.
Books? What books? They were stories two seconds ago! I silently freak out. I don’t want her to know…
“I can feel you, you know. When you get anxious I am one of the first one to know it!”
Of course, she already knows. Can anyone hide anything from their stomach… I am an open book, an open stomach, an open body to my own body. How uncomfortably silly!
“I don’t know if I can write.” I mumble.
I have been mumbling variations of this so very much, I think I have started to compose a melody to it.
“Are you singing?” My stomach asks in a very annoyed tone.
“Me?! I may or may not be.”
“Let’s get serious. You are not allowed to change the subject. Whose stomach are you fooling? I wasn’t born yesterday. Actually I was born on the same day than you did. So… Hold on, I am digressing. You know I am easily distracted, don’t you? Of course, you do.”
“Woman, you can do anything.” My stomach screams. “YOU JUST SWALLOWED THE SUN.”
“You made me do it.”
“I am you though. Am I not? I made us swallow the sun so we can now burn your fear of writing that’s been swallowing us inside out.”
“But this was in my imagination, in a story. Was it not?”
“Yes, it was in a story that YOU WROTE…” my stomach answers, “I mean, with me of course. But you wrote it.”
I wrote something. I was just meant to imagine it but I wrote it. The sun within shines more powerfully and I get lost in its light.
“Finally, she gets it.” My stomach cheers to my speeding heart.
I wrote a short story. My first short story.
“See, you can write stories, my dear. Just write. Now if you excuse me, I am going to bask in the sunlight. This stomach is closed. So you just go and write, I won’t bother you.”
My stomach winks at me and disappears in the light we stole.
And I sit there with my swallowed piece of sun in my belly, watching the sun reappearing as the dragon spits it back and leaves it alone for another six months. The light comes bas`aack roaring onto the world and I whisper towards my stomach…
I shall not spit back my sun.
THE END
photo by Jade Lee
